Sunday, January 31, 2010

Sprung a leak? Get the Duct Tape.

Sometimes your boat can spring a leak and flood back into your mind. In spirit of the great Canadian tradition, I recommend the use some mental duct tape.

I understand the boat enthusiasts out there would probably not use duct tape as their main repair tool, but I find it works quite well for this purpose.

Whether the cargo of your boat is an assignment mark, an argument or another person sometimes it can find its way back into your mind. (A good navigation system was installed without your knowledge. The contractors put it under "upgrades".) When this persistence happens two things should happen.

1. A quick re-evaluation. Sometimes a boat will spring a leak because it is something you shouldn't have put on a boat. Not all things in life can be set off to sea right away. As much as you may not want to deal with it, you may have to. Then, if the results are unfavorable, put those out to sea.
However, sometimes a boat will spring a leak because it is just persistent. Things don't just disappear because they are on a boat. You may encounter them in your daily life.

2. In the case it is just persistent cargo, GET THE DUCT TAPE! Repair the leak and send it on it's way.

Remember that towel I kept mentioning? This is when it's most handy!

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Escape for a while.

Mid-week escape.

Here's a video for a laugh. Hope you enjoy!

or click Here.

Warning: Video contains mature language.
Thanks to YOUTUBE and SNL, creators of the video.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Setting course for sunnier skies.

I had been sitting in that airport jail holding tank for nearly 3 hours just running over the situation in my head.

Immigration officer: "Hello and welcome to United Kingdom. What brings you here?"
Me: "I'm here to see the sights and then start my new job."
Immigration officer: "I see, and did you chat with the British High Commission before coming?"
Me: "Yes, and they said because I am a dual citizen all I need are these papers."
Immigration officer: " But you traveled here on your Canadian passport."
Me: "They didn't tell me to do any differently."
Immigration officer: " Well, I am afraid I can't let you in the country. You'll have to come with me.

AHHHHH! I am now freaking out. I am trying to make the biggest move of my life and instead I am being hauled off to airport jail. How did I get here?

Okay, so paperwork is the devil. I had all my paperwork in order for my big move to England but because I showed up on the wrong passport I was locked up in the immigration holding tank for 9 hours awaiting what I was told was an "immediate deportation".

I spent the first three hours thinking the situation out in my head, swinging from angry to scared to bawling my eyes out and back again. After emotionally exhausting myself, I came to the conclusion that I couldn't do anything to change the situation in that state. This, my friends, was the first time I stepped onto the boat I now so frequently visit.

In that moment, I pictured myself on a catamaran in a calm cove off the coast of some tropical island. The air-conditioning now served as a cool ocean breeze blowing by my face. I could feel the sun shining down on me even though I was in a windowless holding room. I took a deep breath and opened my eyes.

In the hours that followed, I knew my outlook had changed. I was a calmer, more clear thinking person. Even when I was being taken to get my fingerprints and mugshot taken I was able to laugh about the situation with the officers. They let me make some phone calls and I was able to speak to the head of immigration and plead my case. I negotiated myself a ten day pass into the country so I could secure my job and living arrangements, but still had to return to Canada and go back on my British passport, bureaucratic and silly but a compromise none-the-less.

Thanks to my boat, I was able to get through the situation and now have a hilarious story about how I spent 9 hours in airport jail. Since then, I have visited my catamaran and sailed the world over. Whether I am stuck in a job I hate to pay the bills or worried about receiving those results that could change my life, I know I can face the world.

*sunrise picture provided by:

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Building your first boat.

Step-by-step instructions for the first time boat builder. Please read carefully before trying.

Step 1: Close your eyes and take a deep breath.

Step 2: Think of what is really bothering you.

Step 3: Decide how much separation you need from that situation or thing, now to be known as cargo.

Step 4: Now picture a ship at port. Your choice of any design and load the cargo onto that ship.

Step 5: Release that ship out to sea, the ocean or sink it, based on how much distance you need.

Step 6: Take another deep breath and remember the important things in your life that you value and cherish.

You are now ready to face the world again! Congrats!
Warning: The boat cannot be used as a complete escape or get out jail free card. Remember to be realistic about how long you can send it out to sea before having the refreshed mind to deal with the issue.

Examples of how to use the boat:

Bad mark on a test. Send it out to Lake Ontario in a dingy. Regroup and learn from the experience.
Somebody cut you off in the parking lot. Put it in a row boat and sink it to the bottom of the ocean. Let it go.
An argument or highly emotional event. Have it taken off by pirates while you gather your thoughts.

These are only examples, I can only tell you what w
orks for me. But I hope that you make it your own because it has really changed my outlook on life.

In next blog:
I have been known to put myself on a boat or two when a situation gets to tough or to close to home to deal with. I will tell you my catamaran adventures and other tales of ships past.

*pirate ship picture courtesy of:

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Come sail away.

If you're like me, when you look back at hectic events in your life, you sometimes wish you could get back the time you spent stressing out.

In order to combat this, I would like to introduce you to my "boat" theory.

In essence, this theory states that when something that is consuming your thoughts in a counter-productive, stressful manner you should put it on the boat and send it out to sea.

This boat can be any creation of your mind. Mine is often a pirate ship. Cannons, planks, sails and all! But don't feel tied to conventional images. As you will see, the boat often takes on the needs of its cargo!

Now I realize some of you might be questioning, "Why a boat? What can the boat do for me? Who uses this boat?" Well, this is why I have created this blog. I want to explore these questions and others such as can you put yourself on the boat and if so, what happens if you stay there too long?

Follow me on my journey of calming the chaos and finding that happy place!

Don't forget your towel!

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